Unstoppable Confidence

Painting by my brother Roger

We live in a world where anything is possible! I listened to David Nurse in a podcast. He is a best-selling author, speaker, and coach to NBA players as a former professional basketball player. He talks about the psychology of being the very best is to be in integrity with who you say you are with your actions.

1. When we tie our self-worth to our results, we limit ourselves: things like tests, job interviews, how much money we make, the kind of house we live in, the car we drive, and if they don’t measure up to what we believe is success we lose confidence in our ability, because we tie it to what we make it says about us, but it does not have to define us. Results are not who you we are,

2. Self-awareness in who we are, what we stand for, is what defines us.

3. Confidence is knowing that even if things don’t turn out, you’re going to be OK. I ascribe to the thought when one door closes four doors open. All my experiences, including failures, are bringing me to opportunities for a fulfilling life, leading me to what I am ultimately meant to do.

4. If something is not working out, pivot, try something different. Changing directions is not failure.

5. Redefine the context of the meaning of words. Quitting could mean it is not working for you now, but maybe later it will. Challenge yourself. Venture out of your comfort zone and don’t worry what people think of what you’re doing.

Let go of life you thought you should live, to live the life you are meant to live. – Joseph Campbell

Sunrise

In my life, I have been a hairstylist, a teacher, a manager of land claims and researchers, the executive assistant to a National Chief, (AFN) Assembly Of First Nations a Human Resource Manager, podcast host and producer, founder of a Charitable Foundation and a writer. I work in land claims correcting injustices against Indigenous peoples. I get the most gratification from doing work for a cause, such as my podcast and foundation.

I don’t know what else I’ll be doing next , but I am confident I will continue to grow and expand my knowledge. I will continue to not see failure as an obstacle but as an opportunity and challenge. The word pivot comes to mind, to change direction.

I ask myself three questions to reflect on how well I am doing in the previous month and if my actions are aligned with my image of who I hold myself to be.

· Big or small, what did I accomplish, even if it was a challenge?

· No matter big or small, who did something for me?

· No matter how big or small, who did I do something for?

Over the summer I enrolled in a course at university of Alberta, and in the first test I was multitasking and received a mark of 35%! that surprised me! Then I looked at my notes. I barely took any. I had to take better notes and did. My next test I received a grade of 75%, and the next one after that 99%. I changed my notes and it worked. I got better grades and kept going.

I noticed a growth mindset leads to opportunity and success, but that means we must put in what you want to get out of it, if you put in 100%, you’ll reap 100%. I didn’t let the first grade lower my confidence; I knew it was the result of the little effort I put into my initial work. If you tie your confidence to results, it leaves you with nothing but feeling like a failure and often spirals downward onto unhappiness and funk. We are in this loop we use our emotional state to change your mental state and vice versa mindset and behaviour are powerful in creating the reality we desire.

I will tell you another story.

Yesterday, I had a podcast interview booked, and five minutes before the scheduled time I got this text, “Sorry I’ve been offered a boat ride I can’t miss that opportunity, we need to reschedule.” This was upsetting, I felt that my guest didn’t take the podcast seriously, I sent her an email telling her that each guest I give my complete attention, I do my research, organize the questions to get the best impact, my dog is occupied, I scheduled it when I know there will not be deliveries or any other disruption. I turn my cell phone off, In other words, I take it seriously and I don’t waste people’s time or my own. More importantly, I knew I had to be clearer in my intention and expectation of my guest in the future. This one is on me.

It is the story we tell ourselves when we are disappointed, and it affects our confidence. I could have tied her disregard for the interview with me to mean I was not professional or not worth her time, but I didn’t, her action said more about her than it did about me, sadly, I am not sure she noticed.

The intention, goal I have for my Empathic Witness Podcast is that it will be the number one on Spotify. To that end, I will continue to attract interesting guests and invite conversations that matter to Indigenous people. I will be consistent in booking guests, and will be clear in my expectations of them. The summer is booked, and I am currently booking for October.

1. I stand to empower people.

2. My word is my bond.

Dene Youth Drumming

6. Making time in my day for fun, to laugh, and be present.

7. Creating the life, I want with a plan and with my actions.

8. My gratitude, my joy is foundational to my life.

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